Parenting....

One of the beautiful things of it is that people do it in such vastly different ways, but it all seems to work. People have different types of relationships with their children, and that's what makes them beautiful.

I think about it often as so many parents share their children with me. In Prims, church, and on trips to Mexico, I spend lots of time with kids and teens.

At times, when I think about taking other people's kids across the border, I am shocked. I have had many parents allow me to take their kids across the border without knowing me - or even meeting me. I have had other parents allow me to take their kids with only meeting me for "the drop off". At times, I am honored that they trust me with their kids, but I don't even think it's that. I think it's more that they trust their kids, the friends their child has chosen, and that sort of thing.

Being a nosy person, I like to know everything that is going on. I asked Jesus last year what he got for Christmas from the other groups and he wanted to know why... I want to know every part of his life. My parent type would be "involved"... wanting to see how my "child" would interact in a different setting, different culture, and in that type of environment. Others are satisfied by having a short/long conversation with their kid when they come home.

Now, there are lots of different reasons why some people would not be able to come, but it makes me think. I always like to hear people's input and I do try to understand all types of people - but some, I just can't understand.

Being a mom to orphans (in my own sort of way), I like to see people's reactions when they meet my kids (which soon become theirs as well). In November, there's lots of people going down on the trips, so I had to seperate the two. The first one is for families (Patty & Keith, John K, Robert & Angela, Josh & Shae, Leslie & her husband, and another couple). They are all bringing their kids, and it's going to be awesome. The second trip is for the 15 teens that are coming down (and Patty & Keith - can't do it without them). I was explaining this to Madi today to prepare her for not going for 6 weeks since she can only go on the 2nd trip. I told her who was going, and she was so bummed when she found out she can't see Trinity interact with the kids. Right after that, in walked Angela into Barro's. Crazy. Anywho, I feel bad for her, especially because I will be able to see it.

In speaking to Keith today, he said that he and Patty would be willing to lead trips down there without me. I have no doubts that they are more than able to lead the trips, but I don't want to miss out on any time with those kids. They come first, and so to me, there's no reason not to go on a single trip down there.

Anywho, thank you to those of you that allow me to spend time with your kids and sharing them with me. It's an honor and a privelage. I am so blessed. Oh, and thank you for also being examples to me in how to parent and cherish children. Love you all.

You'll have to check out Ben's nephew's blog. He actually set it up pretty niftily. If you go to http://www.jeshuacloud.com, it automatically takes you to http://jeshuaworld.blogspot.com. He has a fancy Mac. According to his mom, Tiffany, he'll do even more with it once he's not grounded from it anymore. I have to say, his two videos on there right now are pretty good.

Here's a half-way update... I finished writing my business proposal (with the editing genius of my favorite journalist friend Jen). I have given it to my immediate boss (the only one that knows about it). Tomorrow she's in meetings all day, and Monday and Tuesday I am testing all day... so Wednesday morning we have a meeting to go over it and see if there's anything she thinks we should add or take out. After that meeting, we'll edit it if needed and then give it to the decision-making bosses. So, hopefully by the end of next week, it will be in the right hands and the waiting game will begin.

I have peace about it either way. I know that this is the time to be giving it to them, so this will just let me know if Insight will be my ticket or not...If it's not...then I can't wait to see what doors will open up to me. If it is, then praise God, one less thing to worry about...

First...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OBIE!


Now...
As I was driving home from the gym this morning, I saw a bumper sticker on the car in front of me that said, "It's not God that I don't like, it's his fan club that I can't stand." On the way to the gym, I was behind someone that had one that said, "Endless war" with the "less" crossed out and with "this" above it. In the end it said, "End this war". They also had some typical World Peace stickers and even one that said, "Iraq for sale".

I can get so pissy when it comes to these things. For one, I know Christians make a lot of mistakes. I make a ton. I can be really rude and mean to people just because I'm cranky. Yet, to say that shows you believe in Him but you choose not to follow Him. That's just crazy. On the ones with the war and world peace... I might not agree with every part of the war, but I support our troops and our President's decision... I also know that there is no such thing as world peace if we're going to have any sort of diversity and let anyone have any decision making freedom. Sometimes, we have to have wars so in the end the people can have "peace" amongst themselves, possibly with more of their surrounding neighbors, and then with the rest of the world. Anywho, there's my two cents.

The time is almost near. It seems crazy to even think about, but it's time. This past week, I have had this urgency and I decided to pick a date - January. I hope that I will complete the move by then. Thursday I talked to my boss to see if there was even a chance and she said yes - but that we need to write a business proposal to get the others on board. I am very nervous as I have never wrote a business proposal and I'm kind of unsure of how you even do it... but I hope to get it completed and give it to them by the end of this week.

Yesterday, Joel's sermon really hit the spot. I can completely understand his heart for the Native American people, because I have that same heart for my kiddos (that I share with many others). I'm sure everyone's asking what kids right about now. :) I also completely understood what he was saying about the whole checkmark thing. I am constantly trying to work on all of the steps at the same time. I am glad that Jay prayed against that because it comes way to naturally to me and it's keeping me from wondering about C and D before I even complete A. The business proposal is A... Also, when we were praying, Randy said that he felt like God was telling him that I was becoming the prayer that I prayed for. This was a really powerful line in Joel's talk and I was really hoping that that was becoming true in my life. It was really amazing to get that affirmation. It was also absolutely adorable that little Sam came over to pray with us. Kids are so precious.

Anywho, I wanted to let everyone know what was going on. I appreciate any and all prayers that I get. I'm kind of talking in code since some people from work have found this site before... I don't think they check it, but still. I think everyone can figure out what it's about though. :)

If you didn't get to read Bryant's post from Sunday/ Monday regarding Francisca, then I would strongly recommend it. It's awesome the little role that he was able to play in her story.

This weekend was one of highs and lows, but Francisca was definitely the highest of the highs. In church on Sunday, there was a guest speaker. At first, I was a little taken back because he talked so loud. I heard the chuckles of some of the teens that came with me as they were overwhelmed by his joust of "Gloria a Dios!". He calmed down in parts, but you could just see the passion and faith in this man. He talked about salvation, heaven and hell, and how to live your life for God while you're here on earth. For the first time ever, I actually understood over 50% of the lesson. It was really good.

At the very end, he basically made an alter call. He said that if anyone wanted to come forward to state their faith in God. Francisca went up without hesitation. She repeated after him the prayer - a bit lengthier than the normal - but it was beautiful. She prayed for God to come into her heart and into her life and that He would cleanse her, wash her, heal her, and help her throughout her life. She thanked Jesus for dying on the cross and all of the normal things that we are so thankful for.

After the prayer was completed, he had people come up to say congratulations. Everyone got in a really long line to tell her congrats on her salvation. I yelled to all the Americans "get up and get in line to tell her congratulations for accepting the Lord into her heart". I think Jared got in line 3 times to tell congrats. She is beautiful girl, but she was so much more radiant while she was praying and proclaiming her faith. You could see her shine and glow with His light in her. It was beautiful. Waking Fernando up who had been sleeping on me the entire time was worth telling Francisca congratulations. There's nothing more beautiful to witness and there's nothing that is more worthy of being celebrated.

I was going to get her a bible and have all of us sign it, but I decided to do the right thing instead. I told Colene and she's going to share the exciting news with her sponsor. I am sure that her sponsor will jump on the opportunity to get her a new bible and that it will be another great bonding experience between them.

Praise God. His work is being proclaimed and people are joining our already huge family of believers. :)

Happy Independance Day!!!

Here's lots of pics from the night.

Ride pictures

Jared, Jesus Guadalupe, Mikey, & Ramon Alfonso
Jared, Zamaira, Kalyn, & Elyot
Jesus Guadalupe, Mikey, & Ramon Alfonso
Kalyn, Jordan, and Bryant
Patty

Elyot and Jesus Guadalupe

Hanging Out Pictures

Lupita and Mikey
Mikey
Zamaira, Lupita, & Jose Julian
Kalyn, Jose Julian, & Madi

Mario Cesar & Marlin Suzeth
Jordan, Kalyn, Patty, Ryan, Shannon

Jared

Nora, Bryant, Mario Cesar

Watching the Fireworks

Their expressions were more entertaining than the amazing fireworks.

Nora & Gabi

Ryan & Mikey

The amazing stormy sky.

An update on my boy....

Two weeks ago, I told him that he had to be good for the next two weeks in order to go to Magdalena with us for the carnival. He said, "OK, OK, I will be.". He knew the conditions of him being able to go.

When we first got down there, I talked to him. I asked him if he had been good for the previous 2 weeks. He said, "Oh, more or less." I asked him what he did, and he said not a lot. I continued to tell him that he needed to help out more and do his chores. I told him that he wasn't able to go last year because he had been bad. Then HE said, "and now I can't go this year because I was bad again." He knows... He does.

I talked to Manuel and asked him who we could take. He said that Jesus could go. I asked him how he has been, and he told me about how he was not going to school and playing video games at the store instead and gambling. He also said that he, Johao, Abraham, and Francisco Ramon had been taking stuff from the orphanage and trying to sell them in town for money. They even tried taking copper piping that connects to the gas stove. After Manuel told me about all of that, then I said he couldn't go. Manuel was happy with the decision, and then we discussed who we would bring... I'll post later this week on that.

I found Jesus and I told him about the conversation with Manuel. He was playing foos ball and I started asking him why he was doing those things. He said that he was only playing the games on recess and that he didn't sell stuff in town. He wouldn't say which ones of his friends were, but he denied it. I asked Adrian to come over "to help me yell at my boy". Jesus just laughed when he heard me say that... He knows more english than he portrays.

About a half hour later, his best friend, Cristian, came over to me and asked me about it. He said, "Manuel said yes and you said no?". Yep. He wanted to know why and I explained it to him that even Jesus said earlier today that he wouldn't be able to go because he had been bad. I asked him if Jesus was angry and he said yes, so I went and talked to him again. I explained to him that I love him lots and that I would want him to come, but that I can't. He needs to do good to be able to do those things and I can not reward him for being bad. He kept saying, but Manuel said I could go... Then I explained to him that Manuel only said that because Manuel wanted to make me happy - not because he deserved it. We then made a deal (even with a handshake) that if he was good for the next 4 weeks, then we can go to his favorite restaurant and to Magdalena. He tried to cop out and say, and if I'm bad, then we will only go to the restaurant... I said, negative - it's either both or nothing.

I have to say, it's hard being a parent. I know that I'm not a "full time" parent, but man, sometimes I feel like it. Marlin is right... I can say no, but it's hard for me. I feel bad. I stand behind my decisions because I was always annoyed that my mom didn't. Yet, it's hard. He has friends that will defend him and back him up like no tomorrow. I'm sure he feels like he needs them because he's so small that he can't defend himself physically. I try talking to all of the boys about how they need to make better decisions - it's hard, but they know what's right.

I heard this song today on Air1, and I thought of my boy. He has all of these insecurities inside his "somewhat tough exterior" and I just don't want him to have to keep up all the time... I'm going to write him another long letter, and I'm going to include these lyrics.




Crazy beautiful

by Chasen
From the album – Shine Through The Stars

Everybody’s been there
everyone’s the same
but mostly we don’t care
isn’t that a shame

We bring us down face after face
the inside is beautiful
but the outside we want to change.
We want to change.

Chorus
Whoa you’re oh so beautiful,
you don’t need anyone’s approval
You’ve got to believe in your self
you know you are
You’re crazy beautiful

There's no need to change
We're different but the same
In the eyes of the King
We're beautifully made
In his image we're made

Take a look it’s all around you
See the world from different views
The way you shine from the inside
I know with out a doubt
It’s more than what you’ll be
In the world’s eyes.

Whoa you’re oh so beautiful,
you don’t need anyone’s a approval
You’ve got to believe in your self
you know you are
You’re crazy beautiful

Who doesn't want 4 boys doing their hair? You can see that they were doing a wonderful job and I was really enjoying it.
Here's Johao, my boy (Jesus Humberto), and Abraham. There is less than 8 months seperating all of these boys in age, and my boy is the youngest. You can see that he's growing at the same speed as the other two boys.

On our last trip, we had Polaroids taken of our group when we were in Magdalena - for a great deal of $5 each... Yes, 5 American dollars. 2 of the other boys said they wanted one, but Jesus didn't. Later that night, when we were talking, he said he wanted one of the pictures. He wanted the one that Ramon had, and I told him he couldn't because it was Ramon's. He then said, "but, it makes me look big." He was right. He did look big since I was kneeling next to him... He was maybe 4" taller than me when I was on my knees (and that's stretching it). For the first time ever, he admitted to me that he somewhat has a problem with being short... I felt so bad for him, but there's nothing that we can do. Poor kid. :)

I've Been Tagged

I've Been Tagged...I have been tagged by Mindy at http://www.straussfam.blogspot.com and here are the rules of this tag...

* You have to post these rules before you give the facts.
* Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name.
* If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
* When you are tagged, you need to write your own blog post containing your own middle name game facts.
* At the end of your blog post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
* Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged & to read your blog! of this tag...

My middle name is Marie.... barf. Anywho, here it is:

M - Made to be a mom to orphans.
A - Amazed by the work God has done and the amount of love He has.
R - Realizing how little I am in this world.
I - Incredibly sick of my job and hoping they fire me.
E - Easily exhausted when I'm plain out lazy.

I'm tagging:
Ben at http://www.prayingmantis.blogspot.com
Keith at http://www.blindsiderawks.blogspot.com
Kent at http://www.bitsofoz.blogspot.com
Shannon at http://www.aroseblooming.blogspot.com
Emily at http://www.emilykaypeters.blogspot.com

This weekend is going to be crazy... There's lots of people going. The definites are: me, Patty, Shannon, Jared, Madi, Ryan, Kalyn, and Bryant. The ones that haven't confirmed yet are: Jordan & Jared G., Marc & Andy C., Stephen & Meridith B., Kellie (Madi's friend), and Ryan & Deanna from another group. We might have 17 people going - it's crazy. We might have to take Shannon's car afterall, if at least two people don't come, then we'll just take mine and Bill's.

I wanted to share about a conversation I had with Jesus on the last trip, just because it's slightly entertaining:

Me: They didn't have needle and thread at SuperVal and I asked the people at the Oxxo too, and they said all the stores are closed, so we'll need to go get it in the morning.
Jesus: Okay, but I want to go with you. Just me and you. Can it be just us that goes?
Yes
Just us?
Yes, just us
(all the other boys stopped asking after this point)
Will you buy me a remote control airplane?
No, you don't need one.
Well, maybe for Christmas.
Yeah, for Christmas!
Wait, can I have an iPod for Christmas instead?
Why? There's no way for you to put songs on it because you don't have a computer.
Yeah, there are computers at my school and in town that I can use.
But you will take money from who knows who to buy songs to put on it.
And when you have an iPod, all you do is listen to music.
Yeah, okay. (finally he understood and agreed)
How about a horse? For school. (he couldn't stop laughing)
Shut up, no.
He gets out his school schedule and shows it to me. We discussed his classes for a bit.
Will you help Ramon Abdiel with his homework?
Yes
Angel and Jesus, will you please help Ramon learn how to read? Now that Juan Ramon is gone, I need you to help Ramon Abdiel how to learn.
Angel: no
Ramon Abdiel: Angel doesn't know how to read.
Yes I do.
Jesus, get something out from school so Angel can read.
Ramon, try to read it.
I can't.
Angel?
No, I don't want to.
Jesus, Angel knows how to read, right?
Yes.
Okay, Jesus, will you please help him with his homework and help him learn how to read?
Yes, I will.
Thank you.
On your next trip can we go to Palo Verde? (it's his favorite restaurant)
No, it's a crazy trip with a lot of people coming and it's Mexico's Independance day. We take a bunch of kids to Magdalena for it.
Can I go? Can Cristian go?
(meanwhile 5 other boys are listening and asking to go as well)
In two weeks, I will talk to Manuel.
But can me and Cristian go?
In two weeks, I will talk to Manuel.
You need to make sure that you are good for the next two weeks so that you can go.
Okay, I will.
Okay, go to bed. What time to you want to to the store tomorrow?
Early.
Okay, good night.
Good night.

I had another conversation with him on the first day about the letter I sent to him. It's great to actually be able to have long important topical conversations with him now. I think I am somewhere inbetween a 3 and 4 year old level with my spanish, but hey, I have to start somewhere, right? It will be interesting to see how this weekend goes, because there is definitely a mix of people.

Oh, and there's another church that wants to partner up with us on a trip too. It's still being discussed, but it might happen for the October trip. Woohoo!

Because I'm a dork, in my spare time (while kids are sleeping and I have nothing else to do), I enjoy googling Imuris and CdE to see what I can find. At times, I have found old pictures of kids that are there and even brought them down to then... Anywho, there's some good reads at the following link:

Commonwealth Adoptions

Here are all of the teens that are in prepatory school. This is the equivelant to our high school, but it's different there. It's 3 years long, and in the last year, they only take classess in their "major". I am so proud of them for going to prepatory school, because it's not something that everyone does. Some people consider themselves done after secondary, and never complete these years. From how I understand it, you only go to prepatory school if you plan on going to college.

Manuel asked me to take pictures of them so he could send them to someone. I was honored to do so, and I have created this collage poster that I will be bringing down next weekend to put in the office.

Marlin & Nora

Here are two of the beautiful older girls. They have both been down there for years. I never saw Marlin for the first 6 months of going down there until Ben & Noah came down and she started sharing her story and photos of her family and quincineta with Ben. Nora knows english, and I met her on my first trip in March when she bonded a lot with Beka Knott. They both play the violin and practice diligently to improve their natural talent of music.

This past weekend, we didn't help out in the kitchen as much as we normal would... Yet, when Keith and I helped out on Sunday night, it was a total blast. Marlin is a girl that takes responsibility very seriously, so when little kids come up with their cute little pathetic puppy dog faces and ask for an extra slice of lime, lemon, or an orange, she says no. Yet, I try to sneak it to them and hope they think I am ignorant to the rules. Well, let's just say she totally called me out on it. She told me that I do not have the ability to say no when the kids stick out their bottom lips and say please. To make her point even more, she started to ask me for oranges and would imitate them. I kept telling her no and told her that I can do it. We continued playfully arguing as she was trying to teach me a lesson, and then after the kitchen was clean, and the oranges still were not passed out, Keith and I left. She then sent someone to come get me and tell me that I needed to help pass out the oranges. I went back to the kitchen and then told her that I will not help because she thinks I can not say no. It was so awesome, and we were laughing and yelling so much at each other. It's crazy, because it's times like where I realize that all of the kids pay attention to us, even when we're not necessarily spending time with them. I try to always spend time with her, but there are quite a few times where it just doesn't happen for some reason or another.

Nora... oh how everyone fell in love with her back in March of '06. I rarely get to spend time with Nora because she is in charge of the little kids a lot (so is Marlin really) and so the time with both of them is split because I'm trying to spend time with all of them as well - and face it, how much quality time do you get with people when there are little kids climbing all over you? Anyways, between that and all of their violin performances, my time with them is scarce. Yet, this weekend, the other group was taking 19 of the older girls to where they were staying for a meal. We thought there was going to be other things as well, but not so much. We didn't eat until 7:45, so we had over an hour and a half just to entertain ourselves. I spent a bunch of that time with Nora. We played Chinese Checkers and then just sat and talked in the chair for a long time. I learned about how she is going to be taking Italian and French this year in school and how she is going to major in languages in high school. I learned so much about her life and we went back and forth from speaking in Spanish and English, and it was just such a beautiful time. We also read a really weird story about pigs in a magazine, and we laughed and told stories.

These girls are beautiful on the inside and out, and spending time with them this weekend was such a tremendous blessing. They are two that will be there for a long time - they don't have the hopes of going home someday, and I am so thankful for all of the time I got to spend with them.

I am going to post a couple different blogs this week about different kids at CdE and the little sweet moments that we had over the past weekend. To start... I'll start with the youngest.

Mikey

Mikey is about 14 months old. I'm actually not sure of his exact age. He and his brother have been there since June.

This past weekend, I changed his poopie diaper at least 4 times. Now, you might be wondering why I would be mentioning this in my "sweet memories" of him, but let me try to explain something to you first. As long as I have ever changed diapers, I have always thought about the day that I would be changing my own kids diapers. I always thought it would be so cute if a little baby would say "ahhh" when someone changed their diaper. I always pictured the astonishment and joy on some person's face if a little baby was in the nursery and said it to them as they completed the dreaded task. Well, this past weekend, I tried it with Mikey. When I was changing his diaper, I said, "Dices ahhhhh". Sure enough, he did. It was the cutest thing ever. We did it over and over. Think about it... A new diaper has to be so refreshing to a baby, and it is definitely refreshing to whoever is changing them... it just seems to fit... at least in my head. :)

Okay, here comes another cute thing to me but gross to most normal people. If you know me well, then you've probably seen me clean some kids face. I don't care if it's eye crusties, boogery noses, or something else on their face. Well, Mikey had some crusties, so, I got them out. What was so cute though, is that after I was done clearing up a nostril, he would reposition himself and squeeze me oh so tightly around my neck. It was the best hug ever. He does that sporadically as well, but it's just extra cute after doing something like that.

On Sunday morning, I got to put him down for a nap during church. It's always so cute watching kids fall asleep. Later on that afternoon, I found out that he was looking for me. He used to call me Ana, and sometimes he messes up and calls me Nana, but it's still so so cute.

Of course, he does all the other cute and adorable things that one-year olds do, but those are the main things right now.

We're back from Mexico. I have to say, this was one of my favorite trips. There was minimal bad news (just from kids that have left - some that ran away), but there were a ton of good reports!

For starters, my boy got my letter and he understood it. Gabby even said that he is doing very well in school and he's been behaving a lot better. I had a lot of really good talks with him about all sorts of different things and everything seems to be back on track for him. I am so proud of him for how much he has turned around in the past 3 weeks.

I got to spend a lot of time with the girls. Even when I try to spend lots of times with the girls, I end out spending more time with the boys - mostly because I sponsor a boy. Yet, Saturday night, another group that was there had something for 19 of the girls. We went past of Magdalena and they had dinner for all of them. I had so much quality time with some of the girls - specifically Nora, and it was amazing.

Mikey, the 14 month old, is practically my son. He is so freakin' adorable, I can't handle it. My boy says that he's his son... Jesus is so good with him. I spent a lot of time with him, and I even cleaned his poopy butt with my bare hand because there wasn't any wipes that I could find. I just took him to the shower and put his little butt under it.

I had a great talk with Adrian as well. I talked to him about how I started to realize why he doesn't get to know the new ones that fast and really invest in him and how I realized I was starting to do that too. We had a great long talk remembering about times we have had and the different people that have left - it's crazy to think about. It left us both sad, but it was a great talk none the less and I think it helped both of us.

It was great to see relationships form between the rest of the group. Keith and Guadalupe are inseperable. Chelsea, Maddi's friend, fit right in and did really good. It was cute to see some kids get out of their shells that I don't see that often - like Elyot.

All in all, it was an amazing trip, and I'm excited for the next one in two weeks. :)